this one is a bit of a memorial to a close friend and ex partner who passed away on the 24th January 2011 and to whom I feel priviledged to have know and to have been invited into his life.
It was July 2006 and unusually warm and sunny in Glasgow, I had been single for almost 3 years, got a new job working with kids, lost 2stone in weight and was happily sharing a flat in the west end with an old friend. Looking good and feeling confident in myself I met Mikael, he was tall and dark haired with blue eyes and a proper beard, almost all I could have asked for. Our first date has to be in the running for the worlds longest and best first date ever, lasting a whole 12 hours and I can't remember there being one minute of akward silence the whole time. A walk through the botanic gardens enjoying the sunshine, then discovering that I liked tchai ovna he sugested we go there because his best friend owned it and well he had built the decking; a few hours passed there and then on to a meal, the cinema and chatting in George square follwed by a walk home through kelvingrove park and the gentleman that he was that meant right to my door.
It all seems a sunny haze now but I will never forget that day it's one of those memories you take with you to your grave and always treasure.
We had a relationship that lasted almost 2 years and it wasn't all plain sailing but it has left a lasting mark on me, he never made me feel stupid no matter what silly questions I asked, made me feel cared for and loved and made me feel incredibly safe. Even after we broke up we remained friends and most of these things remained.
He was not without his faults, grumpy, stubborn and well his house keeping was worse than mine but he was also kind, intelligent, supportive, gentle and to me incredibly interesting. He seemed to have a knack for collecting interesting and intelligent people as friends some of which I now call friends to.
It's hard to come to terms with the fact that he is no longer with us and that any email or txt message I send will go unanswered. I can no longer ask him the important but stupid questions that pop into my head or ask his advice on some viking related matter, which as far as I'm concerned he was a near expert on, he was even doing a degree in Viking studies.
Gathered together in tchai ovna, sat on his decking beside his tree I finally met alot of the friends he often talked about but I never had the chance to meet and it dawned on me the lasting impression he had on all of us, that he is irreplacable to more than just me.
He was ill when he died I wish I could have been around more but distance and bad financies conspired to keep me away and well when your in your late twenties you always assume there will be another time or more times to pick up or catch up with old friends.
So for now I grieve for the loss of such a loyal friend who always had time for me talked me through some tough times and was there to hold me up when I didn't have the strength to stand; and eventually the tears and the heartbreak will lessen and instead of tears there will be nothing but smiles and love when I think of him.
So to my grumpy, hairy, viking man Mikael, who I will always carry with me and never forget. xxx
